The Intruder - Aly Denneane

This quote a été ajouté par aly813
She could feel her body shaking as she silently sat within the far back of her deep ended closet. She could hear the heavy footsteps draw nearer and nearer towards her forsaken bedroom. She closed her tear filled eyes, praying deep within her thoughts. As she continued to pray, she heard her bedroom door squeak open slowly. Her body began to quiver. Thoughts of the unknown leapt through her thoughts. Just then, she saw the shadow upon her closet door. It was too late...

S'exercer sur cette citation


Noter cette citation :
2.5 out of 5 based on 20 ratings.

Modifier Le Texte

Modifier le titre

(Changes are manually reviewed)

ou juste laisser un commentaire


dvorakdan 8 années, 7 mois avant
This is pretty good, a lot of good detail. Two minor issues, one is "she body began to quiver" obviously this is one of those changed your mind in mid-sentence editing errors. And two, the image of "she saw the shadow upon her closet door " didn't feel right to me. Was the door open as the shadow came near? Then, ok, but it isn't clear it is open. If it isn't open, I can't imagine how you would see the shadow without seeing the arm that opens the door, or even half of the body. Bonus suggestion, using thoughts twice in the same sentence seemed a little awkward, you might consider changing one. Still, pretty good.

Tester vos compétences en dactylographie, faites le Test de dactylographie.

Score (MPM) distribution pour cette citation. Plus.

Meilleurs scores pour typing test

Nom MPM Précision
s0uls 109.39 96.7%
emmamai 106.19 95.0%
venus12gates 105.92 94.6%
rayang 105.28 98.1%
peggyrwa 104.41 95.6%
kyle_w 104.24 98.5%
tyler 104.04 97.5%
indykate 103.85 98.3%
user73450 101.85 92.6%
klgrass84 101.19 97.5%

Récemment pour

Nom MPM Précision
user421490 57.36 86.4%
maadj 76.85 95.0%
jony372 47.50 93.9%
cowgirluntamed 94.97 96.7%
user112528 36.61 91.4%
azanmushtaq 75.46 98.8%
rayang 105.28 98.1%
rrapattoni 97.96 97.7%